Grief is not an illness and this page will not treat it as one. But it does live in the body — in the chest, the breath, the sleep, the appetite — and that is where Chinese medicine has something quiet to offer.
The Lung, the Heart and the weight of loss
The tradition assigns grief to the Lung, and the association is uncannily physical: the tight chest, the shallow breathing, the sighing, the sense of something heavy sitting behind the breastbone. Prolonged grief is said to deplete Lung qi, which is why people so often get sick after a loss. The Heart houses the spirit, and disturbed sleep, palpitations and a scattered mind follow when it is unsettled. The Spleen is affected by overthinking, which explains the appetite loss and rumination.
The oldest Chinese account of what loss does to a person is physiological rather than psychological. Su Wen 39 sets out nine states of qi and what each one does to it: in anger the qi rises, in joy it relaxes, in fear it moves down, when one is frightened it falls into disorder, when one is pensive it lumps together — and when one is sad, the qi dissipates. The word is the ordinary one for scattering, and it is why the classical description of grief settles on the Lung and the chest rather than on mood: breath that does not fill, a voice gone quiet, a loss of gathered strength. It is close to what people mean when they say they feel hollowed out.
What treatment offers
Treatment is gentle and unhurried — calming points, often with ear acupuncture, aimed at sleep, the chest and the nervous system rather than at the grief itself, which is not something to be treated away. Herbal support may help sleep and exhaustion. What people often value most is simply an hour where nothing is required of them and nobody needs them to be coping.
Evidence, and its limits, in grief
The research base for this specific condition is limited — small trials, mixed quality. Treatment here rests on pattern-based clinical reasoning and long traditional use, offered as supportive care alongside your medical management rather than on the basis of established effect. The adjacent evidence concerns sleep (Kim and colleagues, 2021) and anxiety (Yang and colleagues, 2021), both of which grief disturbs. We offer this as supportive care for the physical toll, and we are clear that grief itself is not a condition to be cured but a process to be carried.
How we hold space for this at the clinic
People come to Balmoral and Alexandra Hills after a loss for the sleep, the exhaustion or the chest tightness, and often say afterwards that the quiet was the point. There is no expectation to talk. We also keep an eye out for grief that has become something heavier, and will gently suggest counselling or a GP conversation where it seems warranted.
Being kind to yourself through it
Sleep and eat as regularly as you can manage, even when neither appeals — the body carries this more easily when it is fed and rested. Get outside daily. Accept practical help when it is offered. Grief does not move in a straight line, and anniversaries and small triggers can undo a good week; that is normal, not regression. Talk to someone, whether a friend, a counsellor or a support group. And be slower with yourself than feels reasonable.
When grief needs more support
Grief that leaves you unable to function months on, or that comes with hopelessness, is worth talking to your GP about — prolonged grief is recognised and treatable. If you are having thoughts of harming yourself, please speak to someone today: your GP, or Lifeline on 13 11 14. Physical symptoms such as chest pain or breathlessness need medical assessment rather than being attributed to grief.
Individual responses vary, and assessment determines whether this approach suits your situation. Call (07) 3820 2887 or book online at our Balmoral or Alexandra Hills clinics.
Questions people ask about grief
Will I have to talk about it?
Only if you want to. Many people use the appointment as an hour of quiet where nothing is asked of them. We take our lead from you.
Is it normal to feel this physically unwell?
Yes — disturbed sleep, appetite loss, exhaustion, chest tightness and getting sick more often are all common after a loss. Chinese medicine has long linked grief to the Lung and the breath, and patients often find that framing makes sense of what they are feeling.
Should I be seeing a counsellor as well?
For many people, yes — and we will suggest it where it seems useful. Our support is for the physical toll; talking therapy does different and often necessary work.
References
- Kim S-A, Lee S-H, Kim J-H, et al. Efficacy of acupuncture for insomnia: a systematic review and meta-analysis. The American Journal of Chinese Medicine. 2021;49(5):1135–1150. doi:10.1142/S0192415X21500543
- Yang et al. Effectiveness of acupuncture on anxiety disorder: a systematic review and meta-analysis of randomised controlled trials. Annals of General Psychiatry. 2021;20:9. doi:10.1186/s12991-021-00327-5
- Unschuld PU, Tessenow H, translators. Huang Di Nei Jing Su Wen: An Annotated Translation of Huang Di’s Inner Classic – Basic Questions. Volume I. Berkeley: University of California Press, 2011. Chapter 39.
Written and clinically reviewed by Dr Francesco Pennisi
Registered Acupuncturist, Chinese Herbalist & Chinese Medicine Practitioner · Chinese Medicine Board of Australia (AHPRA) · AACMA Member
Dr Francesco brings more than 30 years of clinical experience to Results Acupuncture’s Balmoral and Alexandra Hills clinics, combining acupuncture, Chinese herbal medicine and related therapies.
